Despite eight years of new life in Christ, my poor, guilty soul still becomes overwhelmingly anxious at times. A dark cloud comes and just sits over my head, not letting any hope from God’s promises or past faithfulness get through and restore my joy.
And it’s my fault. It’s unbelief and sin.
God never intended for me to find my abiding joy in the circumstances of this life—”in this world you will have trouble”—but to hope in him and his salvation (Habakkuk 3:17-19; 1 Peter 1:13).
Nonetheless, I still let outward things determine my inward state, with the result that I have fickle joy, not Paul-like joy—the kind that would lead me to say,
I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. (Philippians 4:12)
So when this unhappy lack of sturdy joy leads me to pray (which it always does, and I thank God!), I don’t want to pray primarily for my circumstances to change. I want to pray first for my unbelieving heart to change.
And then I take more comfort in the Father than ever before:
Return, O faithless sons; I will heal your faithlessness. (Jeremiah 3:22)
Via: Desiring God Blog